A Love Letter to Tanzania

Here in Tanzania, I often feel as if I am moving through my days as any day would flow, moving from one thing to the next; observing, responding, reacting, and at times just simply being…and then there are moments when I realize that I really am moving through and absorbing another culture without even trying. It is just there and so am I and it is like a dance. The steps come easier if you just let it happen to you. At the end of the day, I feel the same level of exhaustion that comes from dancing all night! It is a very satisfying level of exhaustion and my bed feels like heaven.

I have never been this far away from home and I had no idea how it would feel. It feels like nothing at all. I might as well be just a few towns away. Home. That is an interesting word or maybe more a concept. I guess that I don’t feel like I am “away from home”. Home is where the heart is. I do believe that. If someone asked me if I wanted to go “home” tomorrow, I would honestly have to say no. I have more to learn. I feel very much at home here. The people are so warm and welcoming. I do believe that to feel love is to feel at home and I carry all of my loved ones around with me everyday in my mind and my heart. You are all with me all the time and it gives me so much courage. Of course, it helps knowing that I will see you all again. I do fear leaving here, because it is unknown if I will ever see these people again. People who, in such a short time, have become so dear to me and have so openly and warmly welcomed me into their homes and their lives. It is a very loving culture. I will miss that.

I love how people express themselves with language here. I was speaking with one of our teachers. He wanted us to explain our studies back home. After I explained why I study and work with housing and families, he goes, “Ah! YOU are in my VEINS!” The people here are so enthusiastic and genuine with their level of excitement. I love how they speak English and it is so fun learning their language of Kiswahili. As I learn more I really am starting to understand what they mean when they say that the language is a part of their culture. It’s vague…as if I am searching for something in the dark. I can feel it, but I don’t quite know what it is…but it feels familiar. That is how learning this language feels. There is a saying that goes something like: “Speak to a man in a language that he understands and it goes to his head; Speak to a man in his own language and it goes to his heart.” It couldn’t be more true. I hope to be able to speak to their hearts, because they speak to mine every day.

When I was younger, I let the world break my heart too easy. Now I am learning to draw strength from the subtleties. There is so much beauty that lies in between. There is so much joy and strength and resilience waiting to be noticed; all along the foot worn paths that carry us along, and the people that pass by one another. There is always the possibility of an exchange. If you decide to engage and greet them, you will receive the largest, most genuine smile you have ever seen. Do not question for a moment why such a smile. Just smile back and let it come from deep inside too. That is an exchange of the beauty that lies in between all that is around us.

All around me, there is work and there is action and there is a strong will to survive. There is love and there is dignity. It can get overwhelming to try and understand the big picture of what is going on and why; always why. I find it helpful to take in the largest view that I can; a whole hillside or mountain range, or whatever is in my view. Then I narrow in and narrow in and gradually focus on a smaller and smaller picture until I am looking at an individual leaf or stone, or something very small. Realizing the complexity and history of even the smallest things that surround us makes me feel calm. It makes me realize how insignificant I am. Not in a bad way, but in a very freeing way. It makes things seem less daunting and it makes the task of putting one foot in front of the other seem so incredibly simple and easy.    

I don’t think that we ever truly realize all that we are capable of. I am grateful for life experiences that show me the ways that I am capable of moving through and interacting with the world. It is an incredibly freeing sensation. Thank you, Tanzania, for sharing yourself with me and in turn, allowing me to share myself with you. I have childlike anticipation for all the ways that our relationship will grow. 

Love,

Sadie Rose Gannett